Here’s Exactly How to Make Your Partner Squirt During Sex

There are certain sex acts that have developed a sort of cult following, and squirting is one of them. The term “squirt” was the 25th most-searched term on Pornhub in 2019, according to the porn site’s annual Year in Review statistics. For many men, there’s something undeniably arousing about a person with a vulva being able to expel fluids just like a person with a penis. And squirting often goes hand-in-hand with female orgasm, which is one of the reasons your partner might be into it, too. (Though it’s worth noting that people can squirt without climaxing-more on that to come. Pun not intended.)

Wondering how to make a woman squirt?

We’ll get there very soon, but first, there’s something you should know. Porn has led us to believe that squirting is a lot more common than it actually is, and when a woman squirts, she’s able to shoot yards across the room. However, the truth is only between 10-54% of women can squirt, according to a 2013 review published in the Journal of Sexual Medicine. And most of the time, women don’t “shoot” like they do in porn.

“There are many misconceptions about squirting,” says Lola Jean, a sex educator and self-proclaimed “Olympic Squirter.” “Given it is a heavily under researched topic and misunderstood act, this is not surprising. You may be surprised to learn that most of the time squirt does not ‘eject’ from the body with force, but rather falls.”

What is squirting, anyway?

When some people with a vulva are sufficiently aroused, they’re able to “squirt” a clear-ish liquid through their urethra-kinda like how people with a penis are able to ejaculate, except in this case, the process has nothing to do with reproduction.

Squirting fluid can come out in a variety of volumes. “It doesn’t mean you did a better job if there was more fluid,” Jean says.

Is squirt the same as pee?

Since the liquid expelled during squirting comes through the urethra, lots of people wonder if their partners are just, well, peeing. Not quite: a 2011 paper published in the Journal of Sexual Medicine study found that most people’s squirt is watered-down urine, sometimes including a tiiiiny bit of female ejaculate, a white, milk-like substance produced in the Skene’s glands.

Now will you tell me how to make a woman squirt?

Almost. Before you get down to business, ask yourself: who is this for? “Squirting isn’t always accompanied by an orgasm and not everyone finds it pleasurable,” Jean says.

Do you want your partner to squirt for their sake, since you want them to have the most pleasurable sexual experience possible? Or do you want them to squirt for your ego? If it’s the latter, then you and your partner shouldn’t attempt squirting. You’ll likely end up putting way too much pressure on her that she won’t remotely enjoy the sexual experience. So, ask your partner if it is something they are interested in and find out why it is appealing to them.

Getting your partner aroused is the first step in squirting.

Turning your partner on will prime their body for squirting. “Arousal will not only engorge the perennial sponge and the urethral sponge making then more receptive to touch, but it will also help build up fluids in the Bartholin’s glands (largely responsible for vaginal lubrication) and paraurethral glands (largely responsible for urethral lubrication),” Jean says.

Arousal can occur from g-spot penetration, clitoral stimulation, digital fingering, oral sex, P-in-V sex, anal sex, or frankly, anything else that gets your partner hot and bothered.

Pro tip: if you’re both new to this, resist the urge to put a towel down in anticipation of a waterfall. That’s a lot of pressure you’re putting on your partner who’s never squirted before. Now, if your partner already knows they’re a champion squirter, then feel free to prep for cleanup in advance!

Once they’re aroused, ramp up clitoral and vaginal stimulation.

Every person is different when it comes to squirting. Some people need firm g-spot stimulation. Others need soft clitoral circling. Some women can even squirt without any direct stimulation to their vulva. Because of this, there are various techniques you can try. You can and should explore various methods with your partner, and of course, listen to whatever they say.

One popular technique involves a combination of clitoral and g-spot stimulation, Jean says. Once your partner is turned on, you then want to shift your focus more to their vulva (if you weren’t already focusing there). Consider using a g-spot wand to apply targeted pressure to her most sensitive internal areas.

“Sex hacker” Kenneth Play previously told Men’s Health his technique for helping his partners squirt, which involves using one hand to hit the clitoris, labia, and g-spot. Once his partner is sufficiently aroused, he inserts his ring and middle finger into her vaginal opening. Using his index and pinky fingers, he presses against the outer labia. He then presses the heel of his hand flush against his partner’s clitoris.

You may think that in order to get your partner to squirt, you need to aggressively thrust with your hand and deliver the most pressure possible. This is not always the case. “Everyone’s body is different and while many enjoy a full spectrum of intensity, these are highly sensitive parts of the body, so they mering away at these nerve-packed zones,” Jean says.

She suggests approaching the squirting process like interval training. “Similar to your HIIT workout, try enacting an interval between time on and time off,” Jean says. “Think of it like an active recovery where you engage in another area, body part, or zone during your time off.”

That said, deciding whether to take a break or not comes down to your partner. You don’t want to cut off stimulation right as she’s on the cusp of squirting. Ask your partner, “Want me to keep doing this or switch it up?”

Do something they really like during that final “push.”

“Once you hear the ‘splash splash’ sound-meaning your partner is really wet-I am telling you now that your partner is capable of squirting; they just have to figure out how to get it out of their body,” Jean says.

Often, women report that they feel like they need to pee right before they squirt, which makes sense, considering squirt does come out of the urethra. This discourages some women from squirting because they fear they’re just to pee. Knowing this is a common sensation can help your partner relax and push through the confusing “peeing” feeling.

Once your partner is about to start squirting, it’s generally advisable to keep doing what you’re doing, Jean explains. “It can sometimes be good to move from internal stimulation to external-your partner can often keep Feeld mobile squirting this way,” she says.

You may attempt everything, and your partner doesn’t squirt. This is completely fine and doesn’t mean either of you did anything wrong. Plus, there’s no cleanup involved. And whether or not your partner squirts, remember the importance of aftercare!